Thursday, February 27, 2014

A Wintery Pocket

It's time to unzip your wintery pockets and let us know the contents. 

It will be fun, I promise. 

Especially because I will give a psychological assessment of you based on your findings.

I know you feel a bit scared, so I will go first. 

-2 sets of van keys. One with a library tag, a chiropractor keyfob and a short piece of twine attached (mine). The other with dealership tags and a leathery thing (Mike's).

-2 slightly used kleenexes. This is something that grosses Mike out. He hates reaching into my coat pockets because there is always something questionable (such as the above). In my defense, a kleenex (used or not) is better than nothing.

-A grocery list written by my 10 year old. (Almond milk, honey mustard, croissants, milk, ww crackers, ice cream, pizza. It also has a friends cell # and a note saying "o.d on oranges" at the bottom.)

-A rumply Porter airline baggage claim tag.

-3 toonies, 1 loonie and a quarter.

There. Now you know everything.


Hannah said...

A Burt's Bees lip balm-passionfruit version
House keys still on the chain that the previous owners gave them to me on.
6 pack of tickets for Searchmont- 2 left

Luckily I cleaned out my pockets to go skiing today or I could have had to add: a camera, library card, credit card, Scene movie card, spare keys, 6 receipts, and a tag for a necklace Laura got me...but those don't count.

Katie said...

Hannah! You are in a good place, psyche-wise. Your natural, quiet confidence propels your life quest for truth and fulfillment. However, your easy-going nature is preventing you from accessorizing to your full potential. This psychologist recommends that you spend an afternoon contemplating what it is you truly want "hanging around." Don't accept hand-me downs just because....

Hannah said...

This is mom's pockets:

-package of kleenex and one used one.
-receipt for dentist and a card for her next appointment.
-keys to the church
-$10.50: $10 bill and two quarters
-thin red gloves

Hannah said...

She is making me pancakes and said I should post for her to be useful!

Katie said...

Mary! I`m hearing an inner conflict. There are such strong pulls happening: full:used, finished:yet to come, complete:split, warm:cold. Your spiritual commitments appear in the center, creating a foundation from which you will draw the energy needed to navigate future choices. I`m prescribing at least 2 hours of giddy fun this week.... I`m talking laughing until you cry or pee.

Michael Larson said...

It`s not just your pockets, Katie, it`s the pockets of all mothers (as the contents of Mary`s pockets confirm). You should never go near one without a flashlight and a good pair of rubber gloves. Even then, you are taking a significant risk as far as I`m concerned.

Jane said...

OK, I'm afraid I am confirming Mike's mother-pocket observations by revealing the contents of mine:

TWO used kleenex - one soaked in blood from a random kindergarten boy who got a bloody nose on winter play day and I was the nearest adult...

a gum wrapper from a stick of Wrigley's gum that still smells like cinnamon.

the top tab from a bag of chocolate covered raisins

two receipts - washer fluid and prescription

a tube of Body Shop lipstick

a bank card


Do your worst, Katie!

Jody Wildman said...

-two grocery store receipts
-gas receipt
-two slightly used kleenex
-four $5, one $10, one loonie, one dime, one nickel
-Ambeaults gift certificate with $0.45 left
-receipts for David's semi-formal outfit
-bullet point list of areas family needs improvement
-paper with three lists:
-list of Oscar nominees (major categories
-list of potential hockey players of David's age from "down the line"
-grocery list
-internet wi-fi password
-security swipe card from work
-four Halls (one empty wrapper)
-four keychains with keys to (almost) every building owned by the Twp
-memory stick with family history info on it
-pack of tictacs
-list of David's hockey team
-key chain with car keys and parent's house key
-Home Depot receipt
-earbuds for Blackberry
-Grace's brooch
-chapstick (original)
-two pens
-bank card, two credit cards, hockey Trainer's card, health card, driver's license, haircut rewards card, Scene card, skate sharpening card, Twp travel insurance card, Airmiles card
-hotel receipt (hockey tournament)
-Mayor business card
-$.05 Canadian Tire bill
-bank receipt
-Wendy's receipt
-letter to NDP leader re: shale gas exploration on St. Joe (from Bud Wildman)
-list of monthly bills

heavy pockets

Katie said...

Jane! Unassuming and warm-hearted. You have a suppressed unease re. the emotional violence lying dormant in every human being. This fear keeps you safe but craving foccacia and handi-crafts. It is recommended that you compose a limerick entitled "The Slippery Slope to the Swamp" and post it on your fridge.

Katie said...

Jody! In this particular case, the depth of your pocket mirrors the depth of your being.(traditionally it means a TON of baggage... but with the balancing effect of the brooch and the Canadian Tire moula, you are clear)
Take cation, for visibility on the path to self-actualization is dangerously reduced by holding close the keys to so many doors.

Time to take a drive (alone) and scream at the top of your lungs until you go hoarse. Follow that with some Native chanting. (I've done it. It works every time)

Michael Larson said...

-rubber band bracelet
-receipt for earrings
-security badge for work
-hand sanitizer
-receipt for groceries
-receipt for swimming
-about $6.75 in change
-2 tic tacs (one of them is orange flavor :)

Megan said...

-almay liquid lip gloss
-viva vanilla lip balm
-RBC bank card
-one unopened werther's original
-one crumpled kleenex
-car keys with swiss army knife keychain (tiny flashlight burnt out)
mail key, house and garage key, one unidentified key, old bike lock perhaps?
-mail/house keys of vacationing friend

Katie said...

Mike! Word on the street is that you bribed me with some GORGEOUS diamond earrings in order to keep me from releasing your psychological profile to the world......

Katie said...

Megan! Your glossy lips have a strong understanding re. the power of words. The power to offer balm or to crumple a spirit. Physically, you are prepared for the fight but are psychologically trapped in a moment of hesitation. Will you take the silly string off the shelf or come at it like a hurricane of teeth and nails?

Helen McRae said...

What kind of coat are we talking here? The coat I use the most? Or a coat I use to go out?

Katie said...

Your choice, Helen.

Helen McRae said...

Alright, I chose this coat because it has more character!
- 1 plastic package for a gate latch
- a piece of silage wrap
- 1 very dirty used kleenex
- a 12cc syringe
- a camo knife
- LOTS of chaff (which is why the kleenex is dirty)
- a pair of leather work gloves
- 1 feed tag for lamb grower pellets and the accompanying string.
Keep in mind this coat has 4 pocks, all of which have decent sized holes in them(my gloves sometimes fall out). Everything is placed with expert precision.
Another side note, this coat gives off a rather goaty aroma.

Katie said...

Helen! You have dozens of rivers streaming from your multifaceted core. Remember, only you have the power to open or close the flow of "self". The goat-y scent indicates an unmet need for weekly karaoke. Get on it.